Stupid

I've got a confession to make. I'm 43. No that's not the confession. I'm 43 and I've been self-aware now, for a good few years and I've been observing myself. I think I might be an idiot.

You know that look people have on their faces when you've done something really idiotic - it looks a bit like they've stepped in some stupidity - I've seen that a lot.

Let me give you an example of why I think I might be an idiot. I get all annoyed and excited about politics get really annoyed about this coalition yelling at Newsnight, shaking my fist at Question time, calling people a "cunt" on twitter - it does feel good though doesn't it? Then recently I just realised, in the last 3 years, all the way through this torrid political time, I've voted in zero political elections and 3 Eurovision song contests. You see the trouble is, Eurovision, I really feel I can make a difference.

And another thing, you know you see on the telly somebody's being accused by the police of something? What do they do? They clam up don't they? "No comment, I want to see my solicitor." What did I say when I wrote off a company car, during daylight hours, on a crystal clear day, no other car involved, what did I say when the police washed up?
"It's my fault, I was going too fast, I was probably speeding."

And there's another thing. My television viewing habits. My tele

I think somebody might have left a really powerful magnate next to my moral compass - you those really powerful ones that if your keys get stuck them you're never going to get them off? One of those you get in scanners at the hospital? My moral compass has been left next to that.

So I think it only fair at this point to give you a warning.

Do not operate heavy machinery, well actually, I can't think of any better advice for life. Actually, what I really mean is - don't let me operate heavy machinery. The most awake I ever get is the state most people are in after a bottle and a half of Benylin.

Things can go down as well as up. Well that's just true isn't it. I mean not enough really in my sex life, but on the whole, that's true.

And finally, and this is most important, tragic consequences Sent from my BlackBerry® wireless device

Posted via email from The Ginger Mumbly